As an adult every November that I have been single and not had a girlfriend has been very hard. It is that time of year when a single person becomes even more aware that there is no one to hold hands with, no one to hold in their arms, no one to Christmas shop with, and no really special person to be joyful with. I am talking about loneliness.
In prayer this morning I realized that this year I feel different. I admit that I seem to be preparing myself for those old feelings of loneliness because I don’t have a girlfriend. So why don’t I feel painfully lonely? I have been getting a lot of questions from my female friends about why I am still single. I have thought about this and determined that I have had to overcome a lot of dysfunctionality. Now I feel that I have come through it and therefore not afraid of any relationship with a woman, it still has not happened. Upon deep self-analysis, I am not insecure about anything that I can think of. It is a perfect time for girlfriend right? So why has it not happened? The holidays are upon us. Why don’t I feel sad and lonely?
I have a great many married friends. Most of their marriages are very strong, very loving and a lot of work. They sacrifice themselves for their spouse. Their “pain” is caused by their giving of themselves for the benefit of the marriage. Their “gain” is someone doing the same thing for them. If they have children, both of them sacrifice for the offspring. A single persons “pain” is loneliness. A single persons “gain” is the freedom to do what they want at any time. In both situations there is pain and gain.
Married people are occupied by doing God’s will within the marriage and family. Single people are occupied by doing God’s will in other ways. For example: when I cook or do any activity for the Knights of Columbus, I am there for the entire event. I do this so that the married volunteers can spend more time with their families. When I do anything with others I make them aware that I am willing to help them any way I can. I am free to love others because I do not have a family that comes first.
From my recent posts you have seen a dramatic change in me because of my recognition, submission, invitation and acceptance of Christ living within me. God’s will is paramount for me. I have given my will to Him and now I observed Him within me. This year I do not feel lonely because I am not alone.